Backstabbing? Check! Underage drinking? Check! Drugs and hookers? Check, and check! All of the regular Gossip Girl plot points are present. So why did the last scene fizzle into a Brady Bunch moment? We’re starting to suspect the Gossip Girl writers must live in Brooklyn because all of the betrayal seems to happen on Manhattan’s Upper East Side but warm and fuzzy moments are always going down at the Humphrey’s Brooklyn loft. WTF? We love the Serena and Dan thing and even the Rufus and Lily affair, but only if it’s going to cause drama!
Here are Blindie’s top ten moments from Gossip Girl‘s “Gone with the Will” episode:
- Chuck Bass’ (Ed Westwick) father leaves him the majority share of Bass Industries, and Chuck is upset! Huh? What?
- Jenny Humphrey (Taylor Momsen) is totally playing the third wheel hag role and blocking Eric van der Woodsen (Connor Paolo) from getting some alone time with his boyfriend Jonathon. Get your own guy Jenny!
- I can’t believe Dan Humphrey told Vanessa about his father’s love child in a candy store! Well, at least it was Dylan’s candy store. And of course it gets leaked to Gossip Girl -on purpose! Silly Dan, doesn’t he know the walls have ears on the Upper East Side.
- We love how the little Upper East Side girls call Dan a “Brooklyn pig” and accuse Vanessa Abrams (Jessica Szohr) of “failing upwards” because she couldn’t make it work with Dan and she’s now dating Nate Archibald (Chace Crawford).
- We love that Blair Waldorf (Leighton Meester) has a sign reserving the eclairs for Chuck at his celebratory brunch!
- OMFG!! Are we sure these kids are in high school?!! Chuck is caught by Bass Industry board members sitting behind a desk covered in drugs and two lingerie-clad women perched at his side! And all thanks to the ultimate backstabber Uncle Jack.
- And amidst all of the drama, Lily and Rufus are lounging in bed basking in their afterglow and reminiscing about old rocker days.
- Too bad Chuck chose “cocktails and coquettes” over “business and Blair” because this time Blair is not sticking by his side!
- So Lily and Rufus’ son is not dead? Damn! Everyone’s a liar on this show! Even the adopted parents. EW’s Ausiello was right!
- The Chuck and Jack feud is ON! And our money is on Chuck for the win.
PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Blankenhorn / The CW