After watching the preview episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta, Blindie just couldn’t wait for the October 7th premiere! So we snagged a screener, put some shades on to protect us from all the high wattage jewelry and attitude, and took notes on all the obnoxious and outrageous moments.

Here are the top ten moments that make this season’s Housewives better than Gossip Girl, Project Runway and 90210 all rolled up into one overpriced package:

  1. DeShawn Snow says “I always knew I was destined for greatness” and “ever since I was little I knew I was destined to be somebody.” Did we miss something here? What did she do besides marry a basketball player? She didn’t even decorate the house!
  2. Kim Zolciak, who we enjoy simply calling “the white girl”, says “I’m a black woman trapped in a white woman’s body.”
  3. And Kim is being kept by, err dating a celebrity who “prefers to remain anonymous” and whom she refers to as “Big Poppa”. Blindie is guessing Poppa is a black celebrity who is either married or doesn’t want anyone to know he likes the taste of vanilla.
  4. Sheree Whitfield who is waiting for her “lump sum” divorce settlement in order to “maintain her lifestyle -if not better” scoffs “budget, what’s that?” with a wave of her hand.
  5. And she plans her birthday party with a staff of people and requests a cake in the shape of her Louis Vuitton handbag! Wait, didn’t we see this on MTV’s My Super Sweet 16?
  6. Alll of the ladies are scrambling to out-glam each other for Sheree’s birthday party except Lisa Wu Hartwell, who throws on a pair of jeans, a satin top and a fur jacket!
  7. White girl Kim meets her fashion designer, Dean Perdue, at a Shell gas station! Off the highway! And changes into her custom tailored outfit at the side of her car! While her girlfriend Nene holds up a coat to shield her! We loved every tacky minute of it!
  8. Dean Perdue’s Catholic-school-stripper dress he designed for white girl Kim and his lazy southern drawl, with the slight hint of a California valley girl, makes us want to see him on Project Runway or his own reality show.
  9. Tell-it-like-it-is NeNe Leakes is denied entrance to Sheree’s party and gets bounced by security! And boy does she tell it like it is in the driveway as she curses up a storm! We were just as mortified as NeNe was and we’re ordering our “Team NeNe” shirts right now!
  10. Sheree actually tears up when she is serenaded by a low-rent R&B crooner at her party! Seriously, is this MTV’s My Super Sweet 16?

PHOTO: Fred Prouser/ Reuters

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