Is this Gossip Girl or One Tree Hill? Why is Nate Archibald squatting at his foreclosed home and Chuck Bass buying a socially-conscious piece of real estate in Brooklyn to help out Vanessa. Oh wait, Chuck bought the property as part of a plan to bed Blair, and Nate still has the family house in the Hamptons. Phew, for a second we thought the Upper East Side was turning into Bizarro World!
Here’s a round-up of the most bizzaro moments:
- Blair enlists Chuck to take down Vanessa Abrams by seducing her, and when he calls the bet off Blair ups the stakes by offering herself up as a prize.
- Dan finds out that trust fund Nate is practically homeless and sleeping on the floor at his empty townhouse. And in true goody two-shoe form, Dan moves the poor little rich kid into his Brooklyn loft by the time the show is over.
- There’s another black character on the show! (the other one being Nicole Fiscella’s character Isabel Coates, who has all but disappeared this season) And Chuck bonds with him! Too bad the character, who is named Horace, is that stereotypical old wise sage reminiscent of a Morgan Freeman character.
- Serena turns the bitch switch on with her mom as she embarasses her in front of the press at their publicity house-warming party by bringing up her brother’s drug past.
- Chuck allows Vanessa to see his softer side, and even drops his Carlton-inspired accent for a moment.
- Eric van der Woodsen is so scandalous! He’s gay! And he used to be such a raging coke head that he once left nose candy on all “the smooth, shiny surfaces” in the house!
- Emmy award-winning dialogue like Chuck telling Blair, “If you thought that was long, you have no idea what you’re in for” right before he seduces her.
- Blair refuses to say those “three little words, eight letters” to Chuck, even though she wanted him to say it in the season premiere.
- Blair gets jealous when she catches Chuck and Vanessa getting close.
- Chuck turns the tables on Blair and leaves her in the throes of passion with this priceless parting remark, “I’ve chased you long enough, now it’s time you chase me.” Game on!