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Archives for Serena van der Woodsen

Gossip Girl Watch: Chuck Has Eyes Wide Shut And Dan Is Hot For Teacher

Is Gossip Girl jumping the shark? A teacher-student romance and an "Eyes Wide Shut" storyline in one episode?! These kids aren't even in college, let alone the big bad world of finance and they're already embroiled in scandals. Here are Blindie's over-the-top ten moments moments of Gossip Girl's "Carnal Knowledge" episode:

  1. Blair Waldorf (Leighton Meester) gets detention! We should've known this episode was gonna be a shocker when the Queen Bee actually gets punished. Well, at least she made Dorota (Zuzanna Szadkowski) do all the work.
  2. Chuck Bass (Ed Westwick) wakes up in a hotel room with a strange tattoo on his arm, and flashbacks of a night of debauchery reminiscent of Stanley Kubrick's last film "Eyes Wide Shut." All obvious questions aside, but does Chuck even go to school anymore?
  3. Does anyone else think the english teacher Rachel Carr (Laura Breckenridge) looks like Shannon Doherty (from the original 90210 years)?
  4. That awesome dialogue that keeps us coming back for more: "Is a scandal still a scandal if you can't text about it?" Hazel (Dreama Walker) complains when their cell phones are confiscated at school; "Talk about the filthy rich," Vanessa Abrams (Jessica Szohr) says when she sees Chuck in his apres-party unkemptness; "I can't believe we're here on a Saturday evening, that's a lot of cancelled retstaurant reservations," Lily van der Woodsen (Kelly Rutherford) laments when she has to attend an emergency parent meeting at the school.
  5. We love when Blair compared Dan and Ms. Carr to that infamous teacher who had an affair with her student, Mary Kay Letourneau!
  6. Blair's plan to take down the english teacher backfires and she faces expulsion for spreading a rumor about Dan Humphrey getting it on with Ms. Carr.
  7. Rumor starts to become truth when Dan meets with the english teacher at a dimly lit cafe. Really? Who does that? Like they couldn't talk at school?
  8. We love how Serena van der Woodsen (Blake Lively) is quick to sell Dan up the river as soon as she sees him barely touching Ms. Carr for like a split second. Blair snaps a photo on her cell phone and uses it to bail Blair out of her lies so she won't have to go to Oberlin!
  9. Chuck goes on a wild goose chase for the mysterious masked woman who pleasured him the previous night and finds out his father was involved in a secret gentleman's club. We're not sure where this is going but since the woman has already turned up missing it's definitely gonna be scandalous and shocking and age-inappropriate!
  10. Dan and Serena are splitsville again! And Dan's already jumped into bed with the english teacher, or should we say the english teacher has already jumped his bones. Too bad the dean of Constance Billard was about to call and offer Ms. Carr her job back!

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Gossip Girl Watch: Uncle Jack Serves Up Betrayal With Cocktails and Coquettes

Backstabbing? Check! Underage drinking? Check! Drugs and hookers? Check, and check! All of the regular Gossip Girl plot points are present. So why did the last scene fizzle into a Brady Bunch moment? We're starting to suspect the Gossip Girl writers must live in Brooklyn because all of the betrayal seems to happen on Manhattan's Upper East Side but warm and fuzzy moments are always going down at the Humphrey's Brooklyn loft. WTF? We love the Serena and Dan thing and even the Rufus and Lily affair, but only if it's going to cause drama! Here are Blindie's top ten moments from Gossip Girl's "Gone with the Will" episode:

  1. Chuck Bass' (Ed Westwick) father leaves him the majority share of Bass Industries, and Chuck is upset! Huh? What?
  2. Jenny Humphrey (Taylor Momsen) is totally playing the third wheel hag role and blocking Eric van der Woodsen (Connor Paolo) from getting some alone time with his boyfriend Jonathon. Get your own guy Jenny!
  3. I can't believe Dan Humphrey told Vanessa about his father's love child in a candy store! Well, at least it was Dylan's candy store. And of course it gets leaked to Gossip Girl -on purpose! Silly Dan, doesn't he know the walls have ears on the Upper East Side.
  4. We love how the little Upper East Side girls call Dan a "Brooklyn pig" and accuse Vanessa Abrams (Jessica Szohr) of "failing upwards" because she couldn't make it work with Dan and she's now dating Nate Archibald (Chace Crawford).
  5. We love that Blair Waldorf (Leighton Meester) has a sign reserving the eclairs for Chuck at his celebratory brunch!
  6. OMFG!! Are we sure these kids are in high school?!! Chuck is caught by Bass Industry board members sitting behind a desk covered in drugs and two lingerie-clad women perched at his side! And all thanks to the ultimate backstabber Uncle Jack.
  7. And amidst all of the drama, Lily and Rufus are lounging in bed basking in their afterglow and reminiscing about old rocker days.
  8. Too bad Chuck chose "cocktails and coquettes" over "business and Blair" because this time Blair is not sticking by his side!
  9. So Lily and Rufus' son is not dead? Damn! Everyone's a liar on this show! Even the adopted parents. EW's Ausiello was right!
  10. The Chuck and Jack feud is ON! And our money is on Chuck for the win.
PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Blankenhorn / The CW
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Gossip Girl Watch: Death And Love On The Upper Eastside

Bart Bass is dead and when the wealthy die the skeletons come out of the closet -and apparently so does Eric's boyfriend. Lily's big secret is finally revealed as Chuck Bass' (Ed Westwick) emotions get exposed and Blair (Leighton Meester) gets all maternal, or maybe just a bit Jewish. Here are Blindie's top ten OMG moments:

  1. The episode title "O Brother, Where Bart Thou?" is so painfully bad. What is this The Simpsons?
  2. Eric van der Woodsen points out that grandmother Cece had gin her teacup -at breakfast no less! And Eric's boyfriend Jonathan finally surfaces, for like a minute, and then that storyline goes nowhere.
  3. A drunk Chuck stumbles to his father's funeral and tells off Dan Humphrey and Lilly Van der Woodsen for killing his father.
  4. Nate calles Blair maternal and she denies it claiming, "I'm not maternal, I've just been spending too much time with Cyrus and I'm turning Jewish."
  5. Always one to find a way to get exposure and publicity, Jenny offers to make amends to Eleanor Waldorf by making her wedding dress -something circa Mick and Bianca 1971.
  6. Blair tells Chuck she would stand by him no matter what, and when she declares her love for him he coldly says "that's too bad." Blair sobs to her soon-to-be stepfather, "only a masochist could love a narcissist."
  7. Lilly finally declares " I love Rufus" but of course they still can't be together. We're not clear why though -is it because she had an abortion years ago in a hospital in France or did she give birth to their lovechild and put it up for adoption?
  8. Serena Van der Woodsen is going to Buenos Aires with Aaron Rose for the holiday to finally seal the deal and sleep with him and Dan is wishing he asked her not to go.
  9. Why don't the Humphreys just move to the city already? They spend all their time chasing after the Waldorfs and the van der Woodsens in Manhattan anyway.
  10. Broken and lonely Chuck finally falls into Blair's loving embrace, then disappears in the morning. We live for unrequited love!
PHOTO CREDIT: Giovanni Rufino / The CW
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Gossip Girl Watch: Stolen Boyfriends And Snowflake Balls

What better way to fill our post-Thanksgiving, pre-Christmas days than with a little Gossip Girl drama. The Jenny Humphrey, Nate Archibald, Vanessa Abrams love triangle finally comes to a head -again. Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf are still trying to resist each other's poisoned charms. Lily Bass and Rufus Humphrey are regretting the missed opportunity to hook up -again, and Serena van der Woodsen and Dan Humphrey are still pretending they don't have feelings for each other. Here are Blindie's top ten WTF moments from Gossip Girl's "It's a Wonderful Lie" episode:

  1. Vanessa locks lips with Nate right after listening to Jenny wistfully wonder what became of her almost fling with him. Vanessa is busted when a photo of the PDA ends up on the Gossip Girl blog.
  2. Aaron Rose's ex-girlfriend Lexi disses his photo exhibit featuring Serena, comparing it to a GAP ad. Hey! We like GAP ads. Lexi's pretention reaches an all time high when she orders a cup of Kopi Luwak coffee, you know, that coffee that's passed through the digestive system of the Asian Palm Civet -basically coffee beans that are shat out by cats!
  3. Chuck and Blair choose each other's dates for the Snowflake Ball to prove they know each other's desires and what does Chuck want as a reward? Blair's most prized possession -her maid Dorota!
  4. Vanessa confesses to Nate that she stole his love letter to Jenny and that she never felt like this way about anyone before, blah blah. While we love the ethnically ambiguous Jessica Szohr as Vanessa we are not liking her man-grubbing storyline.
  5. Jenni conspires with Blair's back up girls to pull a Carrie on Vanessa and humiliate her at the Snowflake Ball with a see-through dress. Really? This is the Upper East Side where maids are traded in bets. You gotta come harder than a see-through dress.
  6. Nate had the nerve to tell off Jenni for sabotaging Vanessa claiming he's glad they didn't hook up because she's not the Jenny he thought he knew. Hmm, we wonder if Jenny knew that Nate was once pimping himself out to a married woman?
  7. It's Bizarro world again on Gossip Girl as Chuck and Blair dig up cheap knock-offs of themselves for each other to date. When they catch their doubles hooking up Blair laments "even our doppelgangers can work it out!"
  8. Serena and Dan spend the entire night at the Snowflake Ball pretending not to care the other will bed their date after the party.
  9. Lily and Rufus find themselves face to face once again, and regretting another missed opportunity to be together, again.
  10. Bart Bass in an accident?! After seeing snippets of the next episode it's clear there's a funeral scene so it's safe to assume that Bart is dead and the Bass empire will now be under the rule of Chuck. Looks like Lily won't be needing that divorce anymore.

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Gossip Girl Watch: Spying On An Upper East Side Thanksgiving

Nothing says Thanksgiving like secrets and lies right? No? Well then, you must not live on Gossip Girl's Upper East Side where family dysfunction means extortion, kidnapping, and surveillance. Here are Blindie's top ten moments on Gossip Girl's "Magnificent Archibalds" episode:

  1. Bart and Lily Bass discover Jenny Humphrey has been crashing at their house when they return from their vacation on Necker Island. You know, that tiny island in the British Virgin Islands owned by Virgin billionaire Sir Richard Branson.
  2. Blair Waldorf calls Aaron Rose a young Big Love Bill Paxton because of his open relationship with Serena van der Woodsen.
  3. Dan Humphrey runs into Aaron at the grocery store - awkward! The two indie dudes compare notes about Serena and Dan spills the beans about her bad girl past.
  4. Eric van der Woodsen cracks into his stepfather Bart's safe, with the help of Chuck Bass of course, and finds gold bars (what else?) and surveillance files on himself, Serena and his mother Lily. After reading his mother's file he discovers she was institutionalized as a teenager just like him.
  5. We just love all the love being shown to the hired help! Lily asks Eric, "how did you get so wise?" he replies, "the nanny," Chuck credits his hot au pair Gina for changing his life, and the kicker is when Blair makes her maid Dorota follow her around the city in full housekeeping uniform!
  6. Vanessa Abrams and Chuck team up to warn Nate Archibald about the FBI and his dad's plan to kidnap him and extort money from his rich grandparents, the Vanderbilts. Wait, Nate's grandparents are the Vanderbilts? Anderson Cooper's Vanderbilt's? And Nate's dad is going to kidnap him to extort money out of them? Geez, high school is rough on the Upper East Side!
  7. Eric finds out his mother was in an institution at just about the same age he was put away.
  8. And after all that drama, Nate asks Vanessa "can we get together sometime to Vanessa?" This guy sure does pull a lot of girls for a broke son of a criminal!
  9. Lily ends up at the Humphrey house for Thanksgiving dinner for a second year in a row! Geez, how many seasons do we have to wait before Rufus and Lily get married?!
  10. Vanessa stoops to Bass level and reads Jenny's love letter from Nate. Ah, Brooklyn girl gone bad!
PHOTO CREDIT: GIOVANNI RUFINO/THE CW
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Gossip Girl Watch: Blair Turns 18, Jenny Gets Emancipated, And Serena Muses

It's celebration and emancipation time on the Upper East side as Blair turns 18, the Bass Enterprise turns 20 and Jenny continues down her Machiavellian road to fame and fortune! Here are Blindie's top ten moments:

  1. The diminuitive character actor Wallace Shawn guest stars as Eleanor Waldorf's new boyfriend Cyrus Rose, and he just happens to be artist Aaron Rose's father. We love that Blair has to chant "I am Grace Kelly. Grace Kelly is me," in order to tolerate his brashness and hugs.
  2. Jenny's partner in fashion crime Agnes, played by Willa Holland, parties way more than she works and practically sabotages their investor meetings by arguing over creative control of the clothing line.
  3. Serena is seduced by artsy Aaron Rose with text messages and maps leading to romantic places like the Cloisters. And despite Blair's warning Serena poses for his art installation only to find out that she is just another muse in his painter's palette of pretty girls. We have to admit the Times Square Jumbotron kiss was romantic!
  4. Bart Bass doesn't have time for his son Chuck but agrees to have Dan Humphrey shadow him for two days a week to learn the business. Bart even invites Dan to the Rangers' hockey game that Chuck gave him tickets for as an anniversary gift!
  5. Cyndi Lauper shows up at Blair's birthday party and even the maid Dorota is starstruck! We are loving Cyndi's new song Bring Ya To The Brink!
  6. Dan was ready to sell his soul and his story about Chuck Bass' love starved childhood and the secret to Bart Bass' fortune -insurance collected on an arsoned midtown building in the mid-1980s, but then his conscious kicks in, again!
  7. Jenny ditches party girl Agnes and sets up her own contract deal, but when Agnes finds out she goes ballistic dumps Jenny's dresses in the grabage and like Angela Bassett in Waiting To Exhale lights it on fire!
  8. Blair has lunch with her mom's new boyfriend Cyrus in an attempt to learn some incriminating information on him and ultimately breaks up the relationship. When Cyndi Lauper shows up, Blair has a "change of heart" (that was a Cyndi Lauper reference folks!) and tries to patch things up, only to realize that Cyrus was manipulating her too!
  9. Bart Bass finally has a heart to heart talk with Chuck and admits that he doesn't blame him for his mother's death but finds it hard to get close to Chuck because he is always reminded of her.
  10. Jenny Humphrey is homeless again when Agnes kicks her out! Good thing she's about to get emancipated from her parents so she can sign those big fashion contracts on her own.
PHOTO CREDIT: Giovanni Rufino / The CW
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Gossip Girl Watch: Jenny Humphrey’s Big Fashion Show

Everyone is up to their old tricks on Gossip Girl with Jenny Humphrey still clawing her way up the ladder of fame and fortune, Blair Waldorf scheming to get into Yale, Serena van der Woodsen chasing after the indie artsy guy, and Chuck Bass giving killer James Bondish dialogue. Here are Blindie's highlights from Gossip Girl's "There Might Be Blood" episode:

  1. After Blair bombs in yet another Yale interview with a prominent donor, Serena suggests she tries kissing up by babysitting the woman's teen daughter Emma.
  2. Emma turns out to be a wild child who declares, "I've got a credit card, fake ID, and I want Bacardi and a boy...this body is open for business." Blair runs around the city trying to stop the young girl from finding a "de-virginator" and finds the perfect blackmail opportunity that will help her get into Yale when she spots Emma's mother making out with another man at the 1Oak club.
  3. Artsy Aaron is proving to be a manipulative player who is planning to add Serena to his harem of women as he woos her with cute voicemail messages and a licorice ring. Too bad he keeps claiming his multiple female friends, who kiss him on the lips and answer his phone while he is in the bathroom, are "just friends".
  4. Jenny crashes the Philanthropic Society's gala and with a guerilla fashion show and everyone is there to see it even Vanessa who catches Jenny and Nate kissing yet again!
  5. A cameo by nightclub king former Ashley Olsen and Jamie-Lynn Sigler boyfriend Scott Sartiano, who owns the 1Oak club.
  6. Nate kisses Jenny AGAIN! But this time somone snaps a photo and it winds up on the Gossip Girl blog where Dan sees it!
  7. Dan Humphrey almost beats up Nate for kissing his sister. "You're the guy who traded sex for money!" Dan yells at Nate and then kicks him out of the Humphrey house.
  8. Blair shows her softer side as she advises Emma to save her virginity for someone she loves and has a change of heart about using blackmail to get into Yale even though she refuses to settle for Princeton because it's a "trade school."
  9. Just as the usually ego-centrical Blair and Chuck learn to be self-less and help someone else besides themselves, do-gooder Dan learns how to get ahead at the expense of others and mails off his story about Chuck's painful family life.
  10. Jenny packs up and moves out! We're guessing she won't be homeless for long, since her fashion stunt was splashed all over the morning papers.
Photo Credit: Giovanni Rufino / The CW
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Archives for Serena van der Woodsen

Gossip Girl Watch: Chuck Has Eyes Wide Shut And Dan Is Hot For Teacher

Is Gossip Girl jumping the shark? A teacher-student romance and an "Eyes Wide Shut" storyline in one episode?! These kids aren't even in college, let alone the big bad world of finance and they're already embroiled in scandals. Here are Blindie's over-the-top ten moments moments of Gossip Girl's "Carnal Knowledge" episode:

  1. Blair Waldorf (Leighton Meester) gets detention! We should've known this episode was gonna be a shocker when the Queen Bee actually gets punished. Well, at least she made Dorota (Zuzanna Szadkowski) do all the work.
  2. Chuck Bass (Ed Westwick) wakes up in a hotel room with a strange tattoo on his arm, and flashbacks of a night of debauchery reminiscent of Stanley Kubrick's last film "Eyes Wide Shut." All obvious questions aside, but does Chuck even go to school anymore?
  3. Does anyone else think the english teacher Rachel Carr (Laura Breckenridge) looks like Shannon Doherty (from the original 90210 years)?
  4. That awesome dialogue that keeps us coming back for more: "Is a scandal still a scandal if you can't text about it?" Hazel (Dreama Walker) complains when their cell phones are confiscated at school; "Talk about the filthy rich," Vanessa Abrams (Jessica Szohr) says when she sees Chuck in his apres-party unkemptness; "I can't believe we're here on a Saturday evening, that's a lot of cancelled retstaurant reservations," Lily van der Woodsen (Kelly Rutherford) laments when she has to attend an emergency parent meeting at the school.
  5. We love when Blair compared Dan and Ms. Carr to that infamous teacher who had an affair with her student, Mary Kay Letourneau!
  6. Blair's plan to take down the english teacher backfires and she faces expulsion for spreading a rumor about Dan Humphrey getting it on with Ms. Carr.
  7. Rumor starts to become truth when Dan meets with the english teacher at a dimly lit cafe. Really? Who does that? Like they couldn't talk at school?
  8. We love how Serena van der Woodsen (Blake Lively) is quick to sell Dan up the river as soon as she sees him barely touching Ms. Carr for like a split second. Blair snaps a photo on her cell phone and uses it to bail Blair out of her lies so she won't have to go to Oberlin!
  9. Chuck goes on a wild goose chase for the mysterious masked woman who pleasured him the previous night and finds out his father was involved in a secret gentleman's club. We're not sure where this is going but since the woman has already turned up missing it's definitely gonna be scandalous and shocking and age-inappropriate!
  10. Dan and Serena are splitsville again! And Dan's already jumped into bed with the english teacher, or should we say the english teacher has already jumped his bones. Too bad the dean of Constance Billard was about to call and offer Ms. Carr her job back!

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Gossip Girl Watch: Uncle Jack Serves Up Betrayal With Cocktails and Coquettes

Backstabbing? Check! Underage drinking? Check! Drugs and hookers? Check, and check! All of the regular Gossip Girl plot points are present. So why did the last scene fizzle into a Brady Bunch moment? We're starting to suspect the Gossip Girl writers must live in Brooklyn because all of the betrayal seems to happen on Manhattan's Upper East Side but warm and fuzzy moments are always going down at the Humphrey's Brooklyn loft. WTF? We love the Serena and Dan thing and even the Rufus and Lily affair, but only if it's going to cause drama! Here are Blindie's top ten moments from Gossip Girl's "Gone with the Will" episode:

  1. Chuck Bass' (Ed Westwick) father leaves him the majority share of Bass Industries, and Chuck is upset! Huh? What?
  2. Jenny Humphrey (Taylor Momsen) is totally playing the third wheel hag role and blocking Eric van der Woodsen (Connor Paolo) from getting some alone time with his boyfriend Jonathon. Get your own guy Jenny!
  3. I can't believe Dan Humphrey told Vanessa about his father's love child in a candy store! Well, at least it was Dylan's candy store. And of course it gets leaked to Gossip Girl -on purpose! Silly Dan, doesn't he know the walls have ears on the Upper East Side.
  4. We love how the little Upper East Side girls call Dan a "Brooklyn pig" and accuse Vanessa Abrams (Jessica Szohr) of "failing upwards" because she couldn't make it work with Dan and she's now dating Nate Archibald (Chace Crawford).
  5. We love that Blair Waldorf (Leighton Meester) has a sign reserving the eclairs for Chuck at his celebratory brunch!
  6. OMFG!! Are we sure these kids are in high school?!! Chuck is caught by Bass Industry board members sitting behind a desk covered in drugs and two lingerie-clad women perched at his side! And all thanks to the ultimate backstabber Uncle Jack.
  7. And amidst all of the drama, Lily and Rufus are lounging in bed basking in their afterglow and reminiscing about old rocker days.
  8. Too bad Chuck chose "cocktails and coquettes" over "business and Blair" because this time Blair is not sticking by his side!
  9. So Lily and Rufus' son is not dead? Damn! Everyone's a liar on this show! Even the adopted parents. EW's Ausiello was right!
  10. The Chuck and Jack feud is ON! And our money is on Chuck for the win.
PHOTO CREDIT: Craig Blankenhorn / The CW
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Gossip Girl Watch: Death And Love On The Upper Eastside

Bart Bass is dead and when the wealthy die the skeletons come out of the closet -and apparently so does Eric's boyfriend. Lily's big secret is finally revealed as Chuck Bass' (Ed Westwick) emotions get exposed and Blair (Leighton Meester) gets all maternal, or maybe just a bit Jewish. Here are Blindie's top ten OMG moments:

  1. The episode title "O Brother, Where Bart Thou?" is so painfully bad. What is this The Simpsons?
  2. Eric van der Woodsen points out that grandmother Cece had gin her teacup -at breakfast no less! And Eric's boyfriend Jonathan finally surfaces, for like a minute, and then that storyline goes nowhere.
  3. A drunk Chuck stumbles to his father's funeral and tells off Dan Humphrey and Lilly Van der Woodsen for killing his father.
  4. Nate calles Blair maternal and she denies it claiming, "I'm not maternal, I've just been spending too much time with Cyrus and I'm turning Jewish."
  5. Always one to find a way to get exposure and publicity, Jenny offers to make amends to Eleanor Waldorf by making her wedding dress -something circa Mick and Bianca 1971.
  6. Blair tells Chuck she would stand by him no matter what, and when she declares her love for him he coldly says "that's too bad." Blair sobs to her soon-to-be stepfather, "only a masochist could love a narcissist."
  7. Lilly finally declares " I love Rufus" but of course they still can't be together. We're not clear why though -is it because she had an abortion years ago in a hospital in France or did she give birth to their lovechild and put it up for adoption?
  8. Serena Van der Woodsen is going to Buenos Aires with Aaron Rose for the holiday to finally seal the deal and sleep with him and Dan is wishing he asked her not to go.
  9. Why don't the Humphreys just move to the city already? They spend all their time chasing after the Waldorfs and the van der Woodsens in Manhattan anyway.
  10. Broken and lonely Chuck finally falls into Blair's loving embrace, then disappears in the morning. We live for unrequited love!
PHOTO CREDIT: Giovanni Rufino / The CW
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Gossip Girl Watch: Stolen Boyfriends And Snowflake Balls

What better way to fill our post-Thanksgiving, pre-Christmas days than with a little Gossip Girl drama. The Jenny Humphrey, Nate Archibald, Vanessa Abrams love triangle finally comes to a head -again. Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf are still trying to resist each other's poisoned charms. Lily Bass and Rufus Humphrey are regretting the missed opportunity to hook up -again, and Serena van der Woodsen and Dan Humphrey are still pretending they don't have feelings for each other. Here are Blindie's top ten WTF moments from Gossip Girl's "It's a Wonderful Lie" episode:

  1. Vanessa locks lips with Nate right after listening to Jenny wistfully wonder what became of her almost fling with him. Vanessa is busted when a photo of the PDA ends up on the Gossip Girl blog.
  2. Aaron Rose's ex-girlfriend Lexi disses his photo exhibit featuring Serena, comparing it to a GAP ad. Hey! We like GAP ads. Lexi's pretention reaches an all time high when she orders a cup of Kopi Luwak coffee, you know, that coffee that's passed through the digestive system of the Asian Palm Civet -basically coffee beans that are shat out by cats!
  3. Chuck and Blair choose each other's dates for the Snowflake Ball to prove they know each other's desires and what does Chuck want as a reward? Blair's most prized possession -her maid Dorota!
  4. Vanessa confesses to Nate that she stole his love letter to Jenny and that she never felt like this way about anyone before, blah blah. While we love the ethnically ambiguous Jessica Szohr as Vanessa we are not liking her man-grubbing storyline.
  5. Jenni conspires with Blair's back up girls to pull a Carrie on Vanessa and humiliate her at the Snowflake Ball with a see-through dress. Really? This is the Upper East Side where maids are traded in bets. You gotta come harder than a see-through dress.
  6. Nate had the nerve to tell off Jenni for sabotaging Vanessa claiming he's glad they didn't hook up because she's not the Jenny he thought he knew. Hmm, we wonder if Jenny knew that Nate was once pimping himself out to a married woman?
  7. It's Bizarro world again on Gossip Girl as Chuck and Blair dig up cheap knock-offs of themselves for each other to date. When they catch their doubles hooking up Blair laments "even our doppelgangers can work it out!"
  8. Serena and Dan spend the entire night at the Snowflake Ball pretending not to care the other will bed their date after the party.
  9. Lily and Rufus find themselves face to face once again, and regretting another missed opportunity to be together, again.
  10. Bart Bass in an accident?! After seeing snippets of the next episode it's clear there's a funeral scene so it's safe to assume that Bart is dead and the Bass empire will now be under the rule of Chuck. Looks like Lily won't be needing that divorce anymore.

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Gossip Girl Watch: Spying On An Upper East Side Thanksgiving

Nothing says Thanksgiving like secrets and lies right? No? Well then, you must not live on Gossip Girl's Upper East Side where family dysfunction means extortion, kidnapping, and surveillance. Here are Blindie's top ten moments on Gossip Girl's "Magnificent Archibalds" episode:

  1. Bart and Lily Bass discover Jenny Humphrey has been crashing at their house when they return from their vacation on Necker Island. You know, that tiny island in the British Virgin Islands owned by Virgin billionaire Sir Richard Branson.
  2. Blair Waldorf calls Aaron Rose a young Big Love Bill Paxton because of his open relationship with Serena van der Woodsen.
  3. Dan Humphrey runs into Aaron at the grocery store - awkward! The two indie dudes compare notes about Serena and Dan spills the beans about her bad girl past.
  4. Eric van der Woodsen cracks into his stepfather Bart's safe, with the help of Chuck Bass of course, and finds gold bars (what else?) and surveillance files on himself, Serena and his mother Lily. After reading his mother's file he discovers she was institutionalized as a teenager just like him.
  5. We just love all the love being shown to the hired help! Lily asks Eric, "how did you get so wise?" he replies, "the nanny," Chuck credits his hot au pair Gina for changing his life, and the kicker is when Blair makes her maid Dorota follow her around the city in full housekeeping uniform!
  6. Vanessa Abrams and Chuck team up to warn Nate Archibald about the FBI and his dad's plan to kidnap him and extort money from his rich grandparents, the Vanderbilts. Wait, Nate's grandparents are the Vanderbilts? Anderson Cooper's Vanderbilt's? And Nate's dad is going to kidnap him to extort money out of them? Geez, high school is rough on the Upper East Side!
  7. Eric finds out his mother was in an institution at just about the same age he was put away.
  8. And after all that drama, Nate asks Vanessa "can we get together sometime to Vanessa?" This guy sure does pull a lot of girls for a broke son of a criminal!
  9. Lily ends up at the Humphrey house for Thanksgiving dinner for a second year in a row! Geez, how many seasons do we have to wait before Rufus and Lily get married?!
  10. Vanessa stoops to Bass level and reads Jenny's love letter from Nate. Ah, Brooklyn girl gone bad!
PHOTO CREDIT: GIOVANNI RUFINO/THE CW
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Gossip Girl Watch: Blair Turns 18, Jenny Gets Emancipated, And Serena Muses

It's celebration and emancipation time on the Upper East side as Blair turns 18, the Bass Enterprise turns 20 and Jenny continues down her Machiavellian road to fame and fortune! Here are Blindie's top ten moments:

  1. The diminuitive character actor Wallace Shawn guest stars as Eleanor Waldorf's new boyfriend Cyrus Rose, and he just happens to be artist Aaron Rose's father. We love that Blair has to chant "I am Grace Kelly. Grace Kelly is me," in order to tolerate his brashness and hugs.
  2. Jenny's partner in fashion crime Agnes, played by Willa Holland, parties way more than she works and practically sabotages their investor meetings by arguing over creative control of the clothing line.
  3. Serena is seduced by artsy Aaron Rose with text messages and maps leading to romantic places like the Cloisters. And despite Blair's warning Serena poses for his art installation only to find out that she is just another muse in his painter's palette of pretty girls. We have to admit the Times Square Jumbotron kiss was romantic!
  4. Bart Bass doesn't have time for his son Chuck but agrees to have Dan Humphrey shadow him for two days a week to learn the business. Bart even invites Dan to the Rangers' hockey game that Chuck gave him tickets for as an anniversary gift!
  5. Cyndi Lauper shows up at Blair's birthday party and even the maid Dorota is starstruck! We are loving Cyndi's new song Bring Ya To The Brink!
  6. Dan was ready to sell his soul and his story about Chuck Bass' love starved childhood and the secret to Bart Bass' fortune -insurance collected on an arsoned midtown building in the mid-1980s, but then his conscious kicks in, again!
  7. Jenny ditches party girl Agnes and sets up her own contract deal, but when Agnes finds out she goes ballistic dumps Jenny's dresses in the grabage and like Angela Bassett in Waiting To Exhale lights it on fire!
  8. Blair has lunch with her mom's new boyfriend Cyrus in an attempt to learn some incriminating information on him and ultimately breaks up the relationship. When Cyndi Lauper shows up, Blair has a "change of heart" (that was a Cyndi Lauper reference folks!) and tries to patch things up, only to realize that Cyrus was manipulating her too!
  9. Bart Bass finally has a heart to heart talk with Chuck and admits that he doesn't blame him for his mother's death but finds it hard to get close to Chuck because he is always reminded of her.
  10. Jenny Humphrey is homeless again when Agnes kicks her out! Good thing she's about to get emancipated from her parents so she can sign those big fashion contracts on her own.
PHOTO CREDIT: Giovanni Rufino / The CW
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Gossip Girl Watch: Jenny Humphrey’s Big Fashion Show

Everyone is up to their old tricks on Gossip Girl with Jenny Humphrey still clawing her way up the ladder of fame and fortune, Blair Waldorf scheming to get into Yale, Serena van der Woodsen chasing after the indie artsy guy, and Chuck Bass giving killer James Bondish dialogue. Here are Blindie's highlights from Gossip Girl's "There Might Be Blood" episode:

  1. After Blair bombs in yet another Yale interview with a prominent donor, Serena suggests she tries kissing up by babysitting the woman's teen daughter Emma.
  2. Emma turns out to be a wild child who declares, "I've got a credit card, fake ID, and I want Bacardi and a boy...this body is open for business." Blair runs around the city trying to stop the young girl from finding a "de-virginator" and finds the perfect blackmail opportunity that will help her get into Yale when she spots Emma's mother making out with another man at the 1Oak club.
  3. Artsy Aaron is proving to be a manipulative player who is planning to add Serena to his harem of women as he woos her with cute voicemail messages and a licorice ring. Too bad he keeps claiming his multiple female friends, who kiss him on the lips and answer his phone while he is in the bathroom, are "just friends".
  4. Jenny crashes the Philanthropic Society's gala and with a guerilla fashion show and everyone is there to see it even Vanessa who catches Jenny and Nate kissing yet again!
  5. A cameo by nightclub king former Ashley Olsen and Jamie-Lynn Sigler boyfriend Scott Sartiano, who owns the 1Oak club.
  6. Nate kisses Jenny AGAIN! But this time somone snaps a photo and it winds up on the Gossip Girl blog where Dan sees it!
  7. Dan Humphrey almost beats up Nate for kissing his sister. "You're the guy who traded sex for money!" Dan yells at Nate and then kicks him out of the Humphrey house.
  8. Blair shows her softer side as she advises Emma to save her virginity for someone she loves and has a change of heart about using blackmail to get into Yale even though she refuses to settle for Princeton because it's a "trade school."
  9. Just as the usually ego-centrical Blair and Chuck learn to be self-less and help someone else besides themselves, do-gooder Dan learns how to get ahead at the expense of others and mails off his story about Chuck's painful family life.
  10. Jenny packs up and moves out! We're guessing she won't be homeless for long, since her fashion stunt was splashed all over the morning papers.
Photo Credit: Giovanni Rufino / The CW
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