Nothing says Thanksgiving like secrets and lies right? No? Well then, you must not live on Gossip Girl‘s Upper East Side where family dysfunction means extortion, kidnapping, and surveillance.
Here are Blindie’s top ten moments on Gossip Girl‘s “Magnificent Archibalds” episode:
- Bart and Lily Bass discover Jenny Humphrey has been crashing at their house when they return from their vacation on Necker Island. You know, that tiny island in the British Virgin Islands owned by Virgin billionaire Sir Richard Branson.
- Blair Waldorf calls Aaron Rose a young Big Love Bill Paxton because of his open relationship with Serena van der Woodsen.
- Dan Humphrey runs into Aaron at the grocery store – awkward! The two indie dudes compare notes about Serena and Dan spills the beans about her bad girl past.
- Eric van der Woodsen cracks into his stepfather Bart’s safe, with the help of Chuck Bass of course, and finds gold bars (what else?) and surveillance files on himself, Serena and his mother Lily. After reading his mother’s file he discovers she was institutionalized as a teenager just like him.
- We just love all the love being shown to the hired help! Lily asks Eric, “how did you get so wise?” he replies, “the nanny,” Chuck credits his hot au pair Gina for changing his life, and the kicker is when Blair makes her maid Dorota follow her around the city in full housekeeping uniform!
- Vanessa Abrams and Chuck team up to warn Nate Archibald about the FBI and his dad’s plan to kidnap him and extort money from his rich grandparents, the Vanderbilts. Wait, Nate’s grandparents are the Vanderbilts? Anderson Cooper’s Vanderbilt’s? And Nate’s dad is going to kidnap him to extort money out of them? Geez, high school is rough on the Upper East Side!
- Eric finds out his mother was in an institution at just about the same age he was put away.
- And after all that drama, Nate asks Vanessa “can we get together sometime to Vanessa?” This guy sure does pull a lot of girls for a broke son of a criminal!
- Lily ends up at the Humphrey house for Thanksgiving dinner for a second year in a row! Geez, how many seasons do we have to wait before Rufus and Lily get married?!
- Vanessa stoops to Bass level and reads Jenny’s love letter from Nate. Ah, Brooklyn girl gone bad!
PHOTO CREDIT: GIOVANNI RUFINO/THE CW